Forgotten Fun

There are so many things we did without a second thought as children.  Then at some point along the process of growing up, we begin to think they are silly and we stop.

Like building a blanket or cardboard box fort, colouring with crayons, finger-painting, running through sprinklers or jumping on the bed.

I'm no psychologist by any means, so I won't go into the reasons we stop doing these things.  

But I will say that I think it odd that we stop.  Why not build a fort?  Why not roll down a grassy hill laughing the whole time?  Why not go get some finger paint and just get messy making art?  Because some other stuffy adult will call us strange or silly or childish?  

So what?  What is so wrong with doing things that used to give us such amazing joy?

I challenge you to go home tonight and build a blanket fort.  

Grab some sheets (they actually work better than blankets), get some of those office clamps (or duct tape - duct tape works for EVERYTHING) and attach the sheets to each other over your furniture.  Gather all the pillows in the house and make a comfy floor.  Attach a camping light inside in the corner somewhere.  

No Trespassing Poster

Now you are ready to get your crayons and a colouring book.  

And remember, you are having fun so if you don't want to colour inside the lines, then by-all-means, scribble the hell out of that thing!  Use all one colour, every colour in the box or outline the whole thing in RED.  

Let your imagination and your inner child run wild!  (yeah, yeah -- we all have one, so just drop the 'tude)

Put ten pigtails in your hair, (gender doesn't matter) hang a sign outside the fort that says "No Trespassing" and start singing "We're going on a bear hunt" as loud as you can!

Why?  Just because.  You don't need a reason why!

My brothers had the most amazing fort in their room when we were kids.  They shared the loft in our cabin and had sheets and blankets attached to the ceiling so you had to go through a maze to get to each of their areas.  It. Was. Epic!

You can also play what I called "Lava" when I was a kid.  I used to play it with my little sister, Jennifer when she was around the age of four.  She loved it!  We had hours of laughter with Lava.

Lava is played by moving all your furniture so you can easily get to it by stepping on it.  Yes.  You are going to walk on your couch.  Just pretend you didn't spend several hundred dollars on it and play Lava.  You won't regret it.  Grab several pillows and put them on the floor between each piece of furniture.

Now any part of floor is called Lava.  Don't step in it, or you "die".  Go ahead and put some music on (or just sing "We're going on a bear hunt" again) and run faster and faster until you step in Lava.  No, there is no winning this game.  You just play until you step in Lava.  Or you are out of breath.  Or you fall down.  Or you laugh too hard to keep running.  And if someone rings the doorbell (like say one of those religious people) make them come in and play Lava with you.  

And because they are likely one of those people who take life too seriously, they will think you are not just having a ball the way children do.  They will think you are crazy.  

So maybe.  Just maybe.  They will never come back again.

You're welcome!

Jess

How To Really Love a Child

How To Really Love a Child 

(with edits by me)

Be there. 

Say yes as often as possible. 

Let them bang on pots and pans.

If they’re crabby, put them in water. 

Let them play in the rain.

If they’re unlovable, love yourself. 

Realize how important it is to be a child. 

Go to a movie theatre in your pajamas. 

Read books out loud with joy. 

Invent pleasures together.

Remember how small they are. 

Giggle a lot.

Surprise them. 

Have a slumber party in the living room.

Say no when necessary. 

Teach that feelings are okay.

Express your own feelings.

Heal your own inner child. 

Learn about parenting. 

Hug trees together. 

Make loving safe.

Bake a cake and eat it with your hands. 

Search for faeries. Catch one.

Build a rocket ship out of a cardboard box.

Imagine yourself magic. 

Make lots of forts with blankets. 

Let your angel fly. 

Reveal your own dreams. 

Search out the positive. 

Keep the gleam in your eye. 

Mail handwritten letters to friends and family.

Encourage silly. 

Plant licorice in your garden.

Open up.

Stop yelling.

Express your love. A lot.

Speak kindly.

Paint their tennis shoes.

Handle with caring.

Hug often.

Play on the playground equipment with them.

Climb trees. Pretend you are monkeys.

Support their dreams.

Say "I love you". Every day.

Yeth It Ith A Lithp

So, last night I was having conversation number 743, 692 with my three and a half year old daughter who, like me, never stops talking. I have noticed in the past that she has had some trouble pronouncing some of her words and have worked with her on pronunciation of a few of them. I have thought for several months now that sometimes her speech sounds a little bit "muddy".

Why it took me until last night to realize that my daughter is actually lisping, I have no idea. Maybe it was because we were talking about her older "thithter" and I was lying down while she was standing next to me and I could see her mouth working while she spoke. After about 10 minutes of work, she was able to say "sister" but only if she kept her teeth together for the entire word.

She has an uncannily extensive vocabulary for a three and a half year old. She can talk the socks off of just about anyone and most adults understand her perfectly well enough to carry on a rather extensive conversation. So I start to wonder...is this lisp something she will outgrow and I can just work with her on it, or is this lisp something that she would need a speech therapist to assist her with? Or...will it stay with her throughout her life?

I did a little bit of research and it has all told me so far that she may out grow it by the time she's four and a half. In the mean time, I suppose it won't hurt to keep trying to teach her how to put her teeth together when making "s" and "z" sounds.

And of course, I'm not about to let her think there is anything wrong with her lisp. In fact, in a three year old, it's kind of cute. But when she's ten and in the fifth grade, she could get teased relentlessly. So, I'll work with her and hope that she outgrows it before anyone gets a chance to tease her about it.

And onward to conversation number 743,693!

Exhaustion

Once in a while I get insomnia and get about three hours of sleep. Okay, well maybe it's more than once in a while. It just might be more like two or three times a week. But I seem to function well that way so I've not decided to try taking anything for it yet. Except for once. I tried melatonin once, and I still couldn't fall asleep so I haven't tried it again, yet.

Sunday night was one of those nights for me. It was three o'clock in the morning, and I was still awake. Three thirty rolled by and I thought, I'd really better fall asleep soon since I need to get up at six thirty. I looked at the clock again. It was three thirty-five. I felt myself finally beginning to drift off. Before actually falling asleep, I heard my son call to me from his bed. I looked at the clock again. Two minutes before four.

Thinking maybe he was just talking in his sleep, I lay my head back on the pillow. He called again. I tossed the blanket off and went to his bed to see him propped up on one elbow. He told me his ear was hurting really bad. I got him a decongestant and a dose of acetaminophen and had him come snuggle up with me thinking that if he was in the crook of my arm, he might settle better and get some rest.

I was wrong. Four thirty. Five thirty. My toddler walked to my bedside with three of her blankets, her dolly and a book. She snuggled into the crook of my other arm.

Six o'clock in the morning. My alarm goes off at six thirty but I don't hear it. I have finally fallen asleep. I have a different alarm that goes off at seven. I hear that one and wake extremely groggy after having only slept about an hour all night.

Shockingly, I was running only twenty minutes late. I get into work, get a few things taken care of and go talk to a coworker about how to take care of some special handling orders while another coworker is out of the office.

I get back to my desk and take care of a few more things. An email pops up and it carries the heavy news that my friend and coworker has passed away. The same coworker who I had just spoken about being out of the office.

I blogged about my experience with that yesterday.

This morning I felt numb. Now I don't know what I feel. Sad I guess. And I'm hungry and about to go get my coworker and go out for a lunch time drink. We both need it.

Early Childhood Education and Mothering

I have a daughter (Elektra) who is going to be 15 months old tomorrow. I know someone who has a daughter 6 days older than Elektra.

I made a list of all the words Elektra can say today and she says 16 separate words (I think, I might be missing one or two). The other little girl can say over 75 separate words including naming and pointing to colors, shapes, facial features (nose, mouth) and even counting.

I was astounded to learn this. Not because I think my daughter is behind or even that the other little girl is advanced...just purely because I realized I don't work with Elektra on language as much as I did with my older children.

Why not? Honestly, I don't know. What will I be doing tonight? Sitting with her in her play yard working on the names of colors.

I talk to her constantly when I am doing things with her but I also have two other children at home that take some of my attention.

Tay is 13 and still talking to me (so far). She loves to be within 12 inches of me most of the time and will even still snuggle with me on the couch. I am trying to enjoy that while I can, but also teach her about respecting other people's space while at the same time trying not to hurt her feelings and make her think I don't want to be close to her. I hear that between 13 and 16 children begin to tune out their parents. She is doing that with my husband but not yet with me. *knocks on wood*
Tay didn't talk really early. She wasn't a late talker either; just "on time" I guess. She was a shy one when she was younger, but seems to have come out of her shell a bit. She is much more outgoing and very well liked by her peers.

Tristan is 7 and a very high maintenance child. He loves to be the center of attention and will do all kinds of things to keep your focus on him. He can be very sweet, very loving and very mild. But for the most part, he is jumping, loud and exuberant. My husband has him playing piano. He's amazing and plays beautifully. If we can keep him focused on the music, he will one day be a fantastic pianist.
Tristan did talk early. He also walked early at 7 months. And is a high achiever in school. Many of the kids like him but if he gets to be the center of attention too often, arguments ensue.

It can be very difficult to be a mother and every mother has challenges specific to her family. My challenges seem to stem from my kids being so far apart. Another mother might say her challenges stem from her kids being so close together.

It all depends on our personal experiences.

May all the mothers out there have at least a few minutes each day where you are proud of your mothering.

Blessings and Peace to all Mothers!

Babies, Kids and Mom

I co-sleep with my 14 month old daughter. She is a great snuggler when she is first falling asleep. But once she is out, she rolls over and proceeds to take up as much room as possible in the same position one would use to make a snow angel.

So, I scoot over to my edge of the bed as she sprawls out in the middle and kicks any form of sheet or blanket off her and me. I wrestle with staying covered as she wrestles with staying uncovered.

She is still nursing, so three to four times every night, I hear her fuss and I roll over to nurse her.

There is a form of sleeping that once you become a mother, you can accomplish. It consists of closing your eyes and looking and sounding like you are sleeping, but still being able to feed a hungry baby, rub the hurting belly of your sick child or even get up and get a drink of water and take a potty break. All the while, still getting something akin to sleep...cause we all know mom's don't really sleep. ;)

Mom's are special people. But children are even more so. My baby daughter is so special, that I happen to know it's her nap time at daycare when I can barely keep my eyes open while sitting in front of my computer at work.

As I talk with people at my work, my teenage daughter comes up in conversation easily with people who I had no idea had children 18 seconds before I met them.

I have begun listening to the music my teen son and daughter listen to so I could have an idea of what today's teens are listening to, and I find myself liking it.

My 7 year old pops into my thoughts at least 14 times every day. Sometimes it's 14 times every hour. Any ideas on how to get a child to eat a meal when he thinks eating is something you do with food sitting in your cheek?

Whoa there, I just got sidetracked. You see, this post was supposed to be about how my co-sleeping daughter is causing massive sleep deprivation which is affecting my ability to focus or even stay awake during daylight hours for that matter; therefore, I am considering moving her to her crib which is in a room on the other side of the house.

I can't tell if that is a bad idea or not because I need to repair about 15 years of sleep deprivation.

I need to edit that last sentence, but I'm so tired, I can't tell what needs fixing.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz